Etiquette

Kill or be killed. Sweet looking babushkas will elbow you or shove you out of their way. Don't get upset when you are pushed, shoved, or stepped on - there's just no getting around it and it's nothing personal. In order to negotiate an exit from crowded vehicles it is standard to ask the person standing between you and the doors if they will get off at the next stop, "Vy seychas vykhoditye?'' The assumption is that anyone intending to get off at the next stop will have already jockeyed into escape position, so a "yes" answer is license for being latched onto and having stale alcohol and belomorkanal cigarettes breathed down your neck. A "no" answer will result in the inquirer clawing and elbowing past you to get closer to the door until they find a prospective exitee.

It is expected that you will give up your seat to the elderly, the disabled, and people with small children so if any of these stand in front of you, stand up, point to your seat, and say "pazhalsta." Failure to do this may result in a diatribe about how nobody has any manners anymore while everyone else looks on in relief that the lecture is directed at you and not them.